It began about 10 years ago when my brother introduced me to the beta version of this Korean online game Ragnarok Online. I always thought it was fun that my brother gets to play first person shooters with his friends online. I didn’t have many RL friends that actually likes video games, and all my friends online at that time are from the art community. So I picked up the game, and started my adventure by myself.

It’s been quite a journey. Even when I stop playing for a couple of years, there’s always something else that has came out of my gaming days. Art, code, even a relationship, no, not a fake one.

The Fan Artist

Ragnarok Online must have been something really special to artists, because I later found out that my artist friends all play as well. Maybe something about the 2D sprites that gave us room for imagination. Many of us would play the games, and create artworks out of them. For me, it was just art, but for the group used to be known as Studio XD, had turned it into something big, something we know today as Gaia Online.

Looking back, a lot more has happened in the 2-3 years I played the game, more than I thought at the time. The biggest things were the friends that I made way back then that I still keep in touch with, and all the art that came out of it. Most of which I don’t even remember doing.

I loved the idea of a group of people with the same past time, all in their respective homes, enjoying the same game and working together as a team. Many of my artworks were inspired by my friends.

I’ve always been taught that video games was a waste of time. Regardless of what came out of it, or how much fun I’ve had. When I was younger, I didn’t care, but as I got older, it seems to get looked down upon even more. And if the game in question is an MMO it will get bashed even more.

But I disagree, and I don’t regret the time I’ve spent playing MMOs. Sure, life could have gone a different path, but I don’t see anything wrong with the one I have now. I think on top of the art that came out of it all, I’ve also learned several life lessons, sparked more interests in coding and making websites. Most of all, I got some small lessons on leadership.

Leadership

RO was also the very first time I came into a position of leadership. I am not sure how I got to that position, but somehow I ended up there as a leader of a guild. I think I’ve always wanted to keep my friends together, and the only way I saw possible was to do it myself.

Back then I didn’t understand much of the concept of a guild. But I’ve always had this idea of creating a common playground for my guild to communicate out of game. That was when I really started to try and code things. I created a simple forum from scratch for everyone to keep in touch when the game is unavailable.

Back then I also tried to keep everyone together out of game when people are bored during the game’s downtime. By getting everyone together to play silly things like pictionary or just chatting with people individually. Today, I still don’t understand why I did that. And somehow, I am still trying to do the same thing now.

I’ve also learned some hard lessons that I’ve yet to adjust to today. A leadership position isn’t to be taken lightly. I learned that a leader is also a symbol, and people look towards the individual as a person to tie things together. They go to the leader if anything comes up. It takes a strong individual to be able to uphold that kind of position. And I was not that individual.

Regardless, I kept on trying my best. There were often moments where I stop and wonder why I did it at all, why do I bother to put so much effort into something that other people probably don’t even care about. I wanted to stop whatever I was doing, and disappear. But I couldn’t, or maybe I was just telling myself that I couldn’t leave people hanging like that. Now that I think about it, it probably wouldn’t matter. It’d suck for a while, but people would find a way to keep going.

I kept it up for as long as I could, until life got busy, or I got bored enough of the game to go back to focusing on life. It happened slowly though, the way I think worked the best. And I think that’s always been how I leave a game, just disappear slowly.

Rinse and Repeat

Couple years after RO, I managed to let some friends in college talk me into playing a new MMO with them. FFXI. He told me stories of what he used to do in the past, something about EQ, his friends. I was sold.

There were about 6 of us total. We began planning on what we wanted to play and do in the game. We were going to work together. I’ve always been a big fan of Final Fantasy, but I had no idea what this one would involve. All I knew is that the last MMO I played was fun, and this will be just that much more awesome because I will be starting with friends IRL.

We all picked a class we wanted in game, well, most of us did. I wanted to play a red mage or thief, but they made me play the damned healer. Yes, someone has to be the healer, let’s make the girl do it >_> I wanted to work with the team, so I didn’t protest too much and got stuck with a white mage.

It was really difficult keeping up with them. I first had to learn how to play the game, which was more complex than RO. Then I had to try and kill things on a weak ass Tarutaru white mage. While the rest of my friends were blasting through with some battle class telling me to catch up.

It was fun though, when I get those 10pm calls telling me to go online to play the game with them. We didn’t really know what we were doing, but it was fun beating up things together. I slowly realized that information was important, I wanted to know where to go, what to do. So I looked up fan sites, printed out quest details, and all that.

Most importantly, I loved knowing where to go. I found this great Japanese map site that I used religiously. But often there would be unclear information because it was written in Japanese, or missing information that I wished were on the site. Eventually, I decided that I wanted to make my own. That’s when it began…

<3 for Maps

I’ve always been a big fan of maps. It’s such a great way to show data visually. When I was young, I remember following maps to various libraries with my friend. We would pick a library that was out of the district, and rollerblade there. It’s always been this hidden passion that I never thought about. I would have multiple world maps stuck on my wall, with stickers over places I’ve been to, and often look at others that I’d love to one day visit. I realized my passion for maps when I created my own fan site.

It kind of began back in RO, I vaguely remember trying to start a map site. But I lacked the technical skills, and somehow ended up trying to do it in flash. Needless to say, it didn’t quite take off.

The second time around, I stuck with it. Worked tirelessly to put together a static site, translating everything from the Japanese map site, then adding my own notes in there. After I was done, I submitted the site to be listed under fan sites on the official website of the game. Without any other links or advertising, it pretty much took off there. People saw a useful site, they pass it along. It was when I learned the value of viral advertising.

Soon enough, a static website was not going to cut it. I continued to learn PHP and MySQL on my own to try and make the website easier to maintain. Two revisions later, FFXI Atlas was what came out of it. It’s a pretty shitty website now due to lack of update and all the security patches that had to be put in place because it became a target for hackers. But once upon a time, it was a pretty big site, and I learned a lot from it. Today it sits there, I guess it’ll be a time capsule of shame, a website abandoned by the webmaster, I don’t know. I have no clue how to close down a site. Apparently people still use it. I don’t know why with it being so outdated and all :/

No more games?

During the time of FFXI and my map site, I actually made quite a lot of money on the site. Enough to pay for rent in college. It also took a lot of time though, and it’s always one of those things where it’s hard to tell people about. Unless the person I’m talking to plays a similar type of game, no one really understands what it is that I’m doing.

There’s always been a divide with life and the online world with these games. Maybe it was just that we’ve all gotten older, but I remember back in my art days, online friends are just as real as people we hang out with every day. We meet up at cons at least twice a year and do our thing together. Artist alleys, jams, all that stuff.

With online games, however, I’ve noticed that people aren’t in the same mind set. It seems like people are just there to play the game together, and that’s it. Nobody really care or want to meet up, or often even want to know you as a person. Maybe it’s just the crowd, but I’ve always had problems understanding that. After FFXI, I thought that I would be done with it all. Forgetting most of the good things that came of it, I decided that MMOs doesn’t fit into my life anymore.

But nope, history will repeat itself again. For the better or worse.

To be continued…

Doing My Homework for Real, for the First Time

I spent a good 3 full days, researching and putting plans together, and decided that I would only be able to go around the central and northern part of the country in the 7 days of the train pass. Maybe I will save the west and south part of the country for my next trip, if that ever happens.

Full Japan Trip Plans and References in PDF format

I’m glad I did the research before hand, I had pretty ambitious travel plans. I knew that on this trip, I want to at least meet up with my friend Azusa and Akira who both were in Toronto a year ago to study English, and I met them through kendo. I also knew that I would like to see as much of Japan as possible, and see the most of the culture.
The entire trip was an eye-opening experience. Not just on how people on the other side of the world live, but because of the people that I traveled with, I got a bit of a life lesson on the importance of communication and what I should possibly do to better myself.

The Cultural Differences

I think I am in a somewhat advantageous position when it comes to traveling in Japan. Having been educated in Taiwan up until grade 3 taught me enough of the Eastern culture, if not a bit too much. Growing up in Canada gave me an idea of what it’s like to be part of the Western culture.

Being in Japan had a familiar feel to it. I am accustomed to a lot of things, both from having lived in Taiwan and from Kendo. Most of the time I was able to read street names and store signs without realizing it, due to the Kanji in Japanese writing. I was unable to match them up with the English/Romanji, however. Sometimes it becomes a bit confusing. But with both Eastern and Western backgrounds, I was able to contrast the culture. Some of major things are:

GREETINGS. I’ve never felt so overly greeted in my life. Everywhere I go, I’m being greeted. All stores must have some sort of policy, where if you come one metre within a customer, you must greet them. When they do that, I feel like I must acknowledge them, it was quite awkward, but somewhat nice. It made the place feel warm and friendly. I always thought that Canadians are polite, but after being in Japan, I think we can only match to 50% of their politeness.

POLITENESS. In a population dense country like Japan, people often bump into each other. 9 out of 10 times I get an “excuse me” in Japanese whenever someone bumps into me, or walks in front of me from a different direction. While on an unreserved train of one of the overnight train rides, the girl who sat beside me asked if it would be ok to sit there, even though I left it empty and without any items on the seat next to me. When it was time to get off, she thanked me. I thought that was strange, but I later realized how big of a difference it made when people communicate and knowledge each other, as opposed to simply doing our own things and ignore all things around us. Still, I have a hard time doing that myself. How do they do it?

PRESENTATION. This one I’ve known prior to coming to Japan. I’ve always know that presentation is very big in Japan, from packaging of items to ways one dress and behave in public. Uniforms can be seen anywhere, and more often than not, they are worn properly. Cab drivers, transit crew, store keepers, cleaners, even construction workers wear uniforms. Cab drivers even wear white gloves, making the cab ride feel like a limo ride.

PROFESSIONALISM. Much to do with the uniforms and the way people present themselves, many of the workers seem to take their jobs seriously and with pride. No attitude, helpful, and very much polite. On the trains, the crew members bow each time they exit a car to go to the next. EVERY TIME. Even when they’re in a rush. And I thought having to remember to bow each time we go in and out of the gym in kendo was difficult.

CLEANNESS. A cleaning crew goes through a train whenever it reaches the last stop before resuming service. A public washroom, even in a RAMEN ALLEY, does not stink of piss. A store in a snowy area does not have mud tracked all over the entrance. Litterless streets despite of the lack of trash cans along the sidewalk. I have no idea how they do it, but once again, it puts Toronto to shame.

HYGIENIC. What I know as the SARS mask can be seen worn by many people in public areas, even more so than in Taiwan. Personally I think it’s a bit much, because that’s what our immune system is for, but I think there may be other reasons it’s worn. Aside from the SARS masks, I noticed that each time I buy food items to go, there is ALWAYS a wet-nap packed with it.

ORDERLY. Lines are formed everywhere. People move to take up less space on non-divided long train seats. People stay in their assigned seats even when there are other empty ones. There are signs in trains asking people to turn off their cellphones and have designated talking areas while on the phone. Even groups of teenagers chat quietly mostly. The quietness can be a bit eerie, but it felt like a nice change to the rowdy party people that we see all too often on our trains.

NO FAT PEOPLE. Be it their diet, daily activity, or simply because of the amount of work people do, rarely can I see a fat person, and I’ve yet to see an OBESE person. Maybe they’re all hidden away at home, but something is up.

I got used to the lack of fat people pretty quickly. But on one of my bullet train rides I was reminded how sad North America is when it comes to the number of fat people. There was this big fat white guy traveling with his wife. His assigned seat was the middle seat, but his ass was so big that he didn’t sit right next his wife, so he sat on the isle seat instead. When the passenger of the isle seat came on a few stops later, he did not seem amused while waiting 3 minutes for the dude to move all of his stuff from the middle seat to the proper overhead storage. then proceed to move to other empty seats that’s not assigned to him. The same owner of the isle seat seemed even less amused to have to move when the white dude was kicked out of his other seat when more passengers got on the train.

These are just some of the major differences I’ve noticed. Now I finally understood why people are so big on traveling. It’s great to be able to see the other parts of the world; how things are done, what are things we can learn, the things we have that we can be thankful for. There’s much more to what I’ve learned on this trip. Stay tuned for part two if I ever get to it.

© SNL

© Adam - Photograph found via TrekEarth

Martial arts is another activity I’ve been curious about since I was little, but lack the support from parents. They would rather I take art classes and piano lessons, play in the local peewee baseball league, or join the Girl Guides. So I’ve decided that once I start working, I would pick up a martial art as my after work activity.

Not knowing what to do, I went with the most standard martial art I can think of, karate. I did some quick research, and signed up on a whim. Unfortunately, my research wasn’t extensive enough, so I may or may not have picked up what was known as a McDojo. It was expensive and I felt like I didn’t find what I was looking for. All those coloured belts didn’t appeal to me at all. In the six months I practiced there, it felt like all those moves I was doing weren’t real, the self-defense moves untested, and all our hits were pulled when we sparred.

It was pure luck, or fate, or whatever you call it, that at the same time, a friend of mine asked if I would be interested in taking kendo with her at the local Korean cultural centre. I’ve always been interested in the sport, but had the image of it being a sport for the richer folks, maybe something like fencing. All those gear did not look cheap, and looks slightly intimidating to outsiders who doesn’t know anything about it. I never thought in my life that I could have a chance at it, and this would be my ticket into the community, even if just for a little while.

Little did I know, it was completely different than what I had imagined. Aside from the language barrier of me not knowing Korean, the beginner instructor was very nice and patient teaching my friend and I–aside from that one time I tried to pick up my shinai with my foot, which got me a shinai beating on my leg by another instructor. I was told that I was the very first non-Korean person to take lessons there, so I should do my best, and I tried my very best. I think I enjoy the strict teachings of the instructors there, as opposed to the laid-back atmosphere of the karate place.

After a few weeks, I was hooked. I loved the ideals that Mr. Song explained to us. The slow pace that we went at. Trying to perfect just one or two things at a time, instead of trying to memorize six different katas and all sorts of breakfalls all at once. It was just footwork, then swings, then slowly putting them together.

Unfortunately, I had to rely on my friend for a ride to the place–it was not easy to get to by transit. Eventually my friend stopped going as I was switching to a new job, and I never got back to the place. I never did forget it though.

A few months after work has settled, I was determined to get back. I looked up the clubs available in my area, and found the Toronto Kendo Club. Having practiced at another club briefly before and knowing what to expect, I didn’t mind joining by myself this time around. Before I knew it I was welcomed there by the great people of the club. Without the language barrier, it was even better than before.

So, for those out there who may be interested in kendo, but unsure how to get into it. I recommend just show up to a practice and talk to someone, or sit and watch. Although it’s a very small and fairly close-knit community, it’s also very welcoming; always looking for new people to join!

© Nikola Solic / Reuters - photo found via National Post

As I grew older, that part of me still hasn’t changed. Back when I got close to selecting a college, or even before then, when I was looking into high schools, I’ve wanted something that will take me away from the city, away from home, to some place different. I wanted challenge, different ways to test myself other than with books, school work, and written exams. I liked to see how I would fare in different situations. I even looked into some sort of military college and other similar options. But it never happened. Be it from the lack of support from family, or I just didn’t try hard enough.

I’ve always regretted not trying harder to get what I wanted, because I thought if I had taken that path a long time ago, it would just be a short period of my life, at the prime of my youth, where I get to try something different, as another way to live life.

Now, every year when I go to the air show, or some place where there is recruitment going on, I always stopped by to look and take an information pamphlet or two. I even spoke to some friends who used to serve in the air force or are currently in the army reserves to learn of their experiences, and what is involved. It all seem so within reach.

But this is no game. The reality of things is that this would be for a certain length of time, and I can’t help but feel that I am too old for it by now. I’ve already spent way more time than I wanted in school, and finally just got into the working world. It would not seem like a wise decision to make.

There can be hundreds of excuses, but I think when it comes down to it, I just can’t bring myself to sign up for something that I can’t fully stand behind. I am somewhat on the fence with “conspiracy theories”, the government, establishments, countries…it all confuses me enough that I don’t want to take part in it other than maybe pay my taxes. If there really is a war, I wouldn’t know what I am really fighting for.

But still, I crave the challenge, activities that pushes my physical and mental limits, to prepare myself for anything that comes my way. I slowly narrowed my options down to a sport–more specifically, a martial art.

To be continued…

I’ve yet to find my way there, but often I would read posts that I wholeheartedly agree on, or entries with ideals that I’ve been following myself for years. I hope others can find inspiration in these blogs as I did.

Illuminated Mind
Possibly my personal favourite. Freestyle living.

Zen Habits
Minimalist living and finding the best out of simple things in life by focusing on things that matters to ourselves.

Stepcase Lifehack
Various topics including money, management, using technology to increase productivity and organization in life.

Unwrap Your Mind
Different concepts for personal development.

NASA Image of The Day
Not really a productivity blog or any sort. But something I simply find inspiring. Seeing some of the images of the universe reminds me of how small we really are, and all our problems are microscopic.

I have this reference folder on my computer. Here are a couple of images I found online with pieces of an outfit that I like or found interesting in general.

© Vogue http://www.vogue.com

http://loveless73.com

Credit Unknown

Credit Unknown

Credit Unknown

Back then when I used to draw, I would draw every single day. If I didn’t draw a picture for a day, they day would not seem right. I worked hard to get better so that I can put down the images that I have in my head onto paper.

Often I would see those artists that I admire stop drawing once they have finished school and started working. I never understood why they did that, and often wondered why.

Now I have become one of them.

I don’t want to give it up, but there are so many things out there that I want to do, and a lot of things that needed to be done. Art just slowly faded out as something to spend my time on.

One day I will find a way back to it.

In the mean time, I’ve dumped all my old artwork into a Flickr account. I never liked Deviantart for some reason.

My old drawings

Above images © Viona-art
Link found via 30 Beautiful Examples of Fairytale Fashion Photography

http://www.goodfuckingdesignadvice.com