Ever since I can remember, I’ve always loved to play war. I would build forts out of wood and lead the neighbourhood kids to go and explore the nearby bamboo forests and the local “haunted” house. I loved adventure.

© Nikola Solic / Reuters - photo found via National Post

As I grew older, that part of me still hasn’t changed. Back when I got close to selecting a college, or even before then, when I was looking into high schools, I’ve wanted something that will take me away from the city, away from home, to some place different. I wanted challenge, different ways to test myself other than with books, school work, and written exams. I liked to see how I would fare in different situations. I even looked into some sort of military college and other similar options. But it never happened. Be it from the lack of support from family, or I just didn’t try hard enough.

I’ve always regretted not trying harder to get what I wanted, because I thought if I had taken that path a long time ago, it would just be a short period of my life, at the prime of my youth, where I get to try something different, as another way to live life.

Now, every year when I go to the air show, or some place where there is recruitment going on, I always stopped by to look and take an information pamphlet or two. I even spoke to some friends who used to serve in the air force or are currently in the army reserves to learn of their experiences, and what is involved. It all seem so within reach.

But this is no game. The reality of things is that this would be for a certain length of time, and I can’t help but feel that I am too old for it by now. I’ve already spent way more time than I wanted in school, and finally just got into the working world. It would not seem like a wise decision to make.

There can be hundreds of excuses, but I think when it comes down to it, I just can’t bring myself to sign up for something that I can’t fully stand behind. I am somewhat on the fence with “conspiracy theories”, the government, establishments, countries…it all confuses me enough that I don’t want to take part in it other than maybe pay my taxes. If there really is a war, I wouldn’t know what I am really fighting for.

But still, I crave the challenge, activities that pushes my physical and mental limits, to prepare myself for anything that comes my way. I slowly narrowed my options down to a sport–more specifically, a martial art.

To be continued…